Mason Baveux and the NHL Strike

You know he wanted to.

Thanks for the bloggery chance again lad to finish off the commentatin on the NHL strike.  The Owners voted to settle up and the Players voted to settle up this week too, so’s they goin to Trainin Camp startin tomorrow, games firin up on Jan 19th with a 48 game season, then playoffs until the friggin end of June if they go seven for the Cup.

I’m a two minds here.  The owners are a bunch of greedy snots.  The players aren’t much better, except they can always argue that their career could end every time they lace up and hit the ice, leavin the paydays behind right snappy.  I suppose you could say I’m semi-sidin with the players, more onside than offside, but I’m callin offside on the owners. 

The owners know they ain’t nobody going to pay $200 a seat to watch them examine a balance sheet or shake hands with a City Counsellor in their private box with the deluxe catering and rivers of booze.

Which brings me back to the whole economicals of hockey.  If you’re a hockey fan and want to go see the Leafs (and whatever they prop up behind the bench as coach now that Burke’s been sent down) there’s a bit of an investment you’ve got to make.

First off, the Leafs suck this year.  Odds are the new coach is as likely to be a terrarium on wheels that they’ll roll behind the bench, wheelin it back and forth each period.  Inside’ll be a turtle or a spotted lizard who’ll do as good a job as anything coachin this collection of players they got.  If the lizard sticks out his tongue, change lines.  If he sits under the heatlamp in the third period, pull the goalie.  Coachin done.  Feed him some raw meat, or likely just a leftover hot dog from a private box.

What I mean of investment, is more in the financial side.  Gettin to the game is $50 for parking.  Seats are $100 at least so you can see the ice in the near distance.  Beer is $14, program is $10 and they’ve got a special on hot dogs.  Their $2 hot dog is now $12.  Or to add up the numbers, if you were inclined to take a family of four to a game, you’re in the ditch about $600 before the players hit the ice and you mumble the words to O Canada. 

For your 6 large you get packed into a sweatbox, surrounded by yahoos, drunkards and truckers with Tourette’s who insist that standing up in front of your kids and swearing is “good for team spirit” up until they puke on the youngest, or pass out face first into a urinal between periods in a Men’s room that smells worse than a latrine trench at the dialysis sleep over camp for the Incontinent. 

Then when she’s all over and the Leafs have lost again, you got a 2 hour wait to get out of the parking and start home in a car that smells like piss, beer, sweat and puke.  And you family.

Frankly, you’re better off to stay home and watch the game on TV, investin the $600 in upfront payments to some Nigerian minister who’s get $10 million of ill-gotten gains he wants to launder through your chequing account. 

I spose this is my way of sayin’ eff this season, I’m not goin to any games.  The NHL can go to hell, get cancer of the eyes, fall down a flight of stairs, break a hip and die in a fire for the 2013 season.  I’m not givin Bettman my money. 

You can call me back in September and maybe I’ll think about it, but right now, to hell with em.  I’ll watch indoor soccer, or stare at the aquarium channel for four hours on game night.


3 responses to “Mason Baveux and the NHL Strike

  1. Seems you are a bit peeved with the whole strike situation. I am not a hockey fan in any way & even I hate the strike! I was hoping they would just keep on going until the whole season was a wash out & then maybe some of the money grubbers might get the message about their own stupidity. Too bad all the talk is about hockey now they have settled. Whoofff . . .

  2. Hey, Mason! Good ta see ya! Sorry I’ve been a bit AWOL here, been havin’ me a mix o’ headaches, flu, an’ hinky Internet. Kinda makes a guy incommunicado, know what I mean? 😉
    $600 fer a night? Well, that’s what, about $20 US? Not bad, eh? :p
    Okay, now I’ll play nice. Never been one fer hockey, more partial to the baseball in my youth. Same thing’s been happenin’ over on the diamonds, as well as in the NFL stadiums (stadia?) an’ such. Cheaper ta have yer mates come over’n barf all over yer carpet than engagin’ in the hand-ta-hand what passes fer gettin’ into a sports park. Sure, the whole “feel” is better inside Wrigley than on the boob tube, but just trying ta get there from the suburbs woulda made Napoleon’s march on Moscow look like a walk in the park! Better ta pull up yer favourite chair, drop a coupla could sixpacks in a bucket a ice, lean back, an’ enjoy! An’ if the strikes REALLY get to ya, get yerself ESPN on cable or satellite, an’ ya can catch games from 20 or 30 years ago!
    ‘Sides, the only folk in sports truly earnin’ their paycheks are the guys what gotta clean out the heads after a game…. 😯

  3. Hi Road Dave, You are quite the blogger. You’ve been doing this for almost 11 years??? WOW!!! I’m going to have to do a bit of exploring on this site!! Meanwhile thanks for dropping by my site. I’m thoroughly honored since I’m not a hockey person or sports really, but there you were pressing a like in my box. So thank you kindly, and now I’ll explore your site. Welcome back any time! Marsha Lee 🙂

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